The woman God honors and crowns “watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” (Proverbs 31:27)
Watching over our household affairs as a wife and mother involves more than we may realize, but it is well within our ability and means. We can do far more than we think we can when we are doing the things that are good and right in the sight of God. Women should be very involved with all the things that concern their husbands, children and homes. The home of your family is your main priority in life as a wife and mother.
It is well within our ability and means to make the home, above all other places, the best place on earth for our family. God has given us the means with which to do so, but so often we do other things with what He’s given us.
As a young girl and young wife I never wanted to seek employment out in the world. I never understood why I didn’t have that motivation (as my mother and her husband wanted me to have). Then after I met Jesus and began to learn from God’s Word about my purpose as His daughter I understood why I was never motivated to work out in the world although I did. I had many different kinds of worldly jobs, but none of them were what I was meant to do with the wealth inside me. When I began doing what I was meant to do, I thrived! It fulfilled me.
I see so many girls and wives today wasting away because they do not understand their true purpose in life. The god of this world continues to blind eyes and lead people to live empty worthless lives. Most girls today are looking at the wrong role models and listening to the wrong teachers.
To be a wise manager of your household might mean that you stop pressing your husband on some issue and just submit to him and give the issue over to the Lord.
To be a wise manager of your home might mean you separate from a worldly friend who gossips and meddles, or from a demanding loved one because of how they want to control your time and resources. It might mean that you live with less worldly things, and from doing so many worldly things so that you can stay home and take care of your family and home. Home should be the best place on earth that your family has ever been.
Women that enjoy getting together to pray for their husbands and children are the good company you should keep as God’s daughters. To be your husband’s ‘true’ helpmate will be a battle that you must win, even daily, if you want a good stable marriage and godly children that will eventually make you both proud.
Most wives don’t know what their husband is going through each day, and sadly some of them really don’t care to know lest it take them away from something they would rather do. Your main priority is to make sure your husband comes home to a loving wife, thankful children and a peaceful well-kept home. No matter how you or your husband were brought up – you can still learn how to keep a peaceful clean organized home. It will feel like a fulltime job without pay, but your praise and reward will come in due time.
If you like to meddle, meddle at home where you have the ‘right’ to know and ask questions, and to be critical in a constructive way. Meddle with your own children; pry into their thought life to find out how they think and what their desires are. Ask questions to find out who their friends are and how they are conducting themselves around their friends. Most mothers don’t know what their children are faced with at school and what kind of company they are keeping.
If you’re duty-bound to criticize, then evaluate yourself as to your own intentions and work at home, and not someone else’s. When women get together to “chat” it’s inevitable that when words are many, sin is present. But, when women get together to “pray and build each other up” with the Word of God, the family and home is benefitted greatly.
As the wise manager of your household you should be aware of who your children are interacting with. They are ignorantly getting connected to threatening things to their person or purpose that they don’t see or understand. They are developing thought patterns and behavior patterns by who they are with and who they are being taught by. Your children are involved with people and dealing with things that you need to know about as a parent; that you need to be involved with for their sake whether they like or it not. There are people, places and teachers that your children need you to protect them from because of their strong influence on your children. God holds you responsible for what your children are taught and held accountable to by others. Children are first accountable to their parents, and then to God.
There are evil spirits that are at work around your husband and children (as well as yourself) that you need to be aware of as a wise manager of your household. I just wish I had not been so naïve when I was raising our four children. The older women should teach the younger women about the schemes of the devil against their marriage, children and home-life. What I see today are younger women shunning the wisdom and faith of older women. No wonder there is the rapid progression of broken marriages and dysfunctional families today within God’s church.
For a mother of ‘adult’ children it is hard to see things that grieve you and not say anything about it – until asked of course. I can’t tell you how many times I have found ‘prayer’ to be the perfect replacement for grief, anger, gossip, meddling and even for revenge. If we let it, prayer will teach us to be patient, understanding and hopeful.
There is no better way to watch over the affairs of your adult children after they move out of your home, marry and begin their own families – than to bring your foresight, grief or anger to our Father who knows how to prod and teach them in ways you never could.
To be a wise manager of your home and family might mean you quit the job or career that demands too much of your thoughts and time. It might mean you move to a smaller home and learn to live on less. It might mean that you stay with your foolish husband, instead of leaving him, and learn to be his godly helpmate praying for him like a mighty warrior. It might mean that you stop going to women’s social meetings at church, or out with your girlfriends who just wanna’ have fun. It might mean that you stop watching so much television or spending so much time with Facebook conversations. It might mean that you open your home to the Lord for His use with neighbors or needy persons and let your children be involved. It might mean that you pull your children out of the public school to team up with home-schooling moms. It might mean that you go on a ‘fast’ so you can hear what the Holy Spirit is trying to say to you. As a wife and mother your life is about family and home first. The devil is working against this!
Being a good manager of your household means that you help your husband with what God gave him to do as the provider, protector and spiritual leader of the family. Helping him does not mean that you do it for him when you don’t think he’s doing it, or doing it right. Helping him means that you pray for him and encourage him. You might not know how to encourage him or pray for him, but the Holy Spirit does. And the same goes for your children. What we often think our husband and children need from God, might not be what God sees that they need from Him. The Holy Spirit is our guide into all the truth. (John 16:13)
Fallacy: Little children need a social life outside their family. Truth: Little children don’t need a social life outside their family. Family is more than enough of a “social life” for any little child. It is harmful when children have too many people and voices in their lives. Before their circle of influence increases they need to know some things that they can only learn at home with their parents that truly love them and are looking out for their godly good. There’s more than enough challenges at home for their mental and physical abilities to be developed. Too much challenge too early in their lives is harmful, even for most teenagers. Ignore the propaganda that tells you otherwise.
Fallacy: Children need to be sent to public school, and the earlier the better. Truth: Children are to learn from their parents at home until they are ready to develop skills that their parents do not have. There is a firm foundation of truth and godliness that first needs to form within our children, to develop their value system and form their godly character before they learn anything else out in the world. Remember what our Lord taught about the house built on sinking sand verses the house build on solid rock!
“And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and slammed against that house; and yet it did not fall, for it had been founded on the rock. Everyone who hears these words of Mine and does not act on them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. The rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and slammed against that house; and it fell – and great was its fall.” Matthew 7:25-27
“The Lord will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure.” Isaiah 33:6
“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. For through me your days will be many, and years will be added to your life. If you are wise, your wisdom will reward you; if you are a mocker, you alone will suffer.” Proverbs 9:10-12
Children will either grow up to be a benefit to society or a burden to society. When you send your little one out of your watch and care each day – do you know what you are allowing to seed and start in him or her? Putting them outside your home and in someone else’s care each day forces them to turn to other people instead of to you their parent. They trust that where you send them is good and safe for them. It can cause them to depend on people that in God’s eyes they should not depend on. They can learn from the wrong people how to take liberties they shouldn’t have yet until they understand the consequence of taking that liberty. Wherever a child is placed each day, there they will learn, but it may not be the learning they should have, or at least not yet. The devil works to make us think we have God’s blessing, when we don’t.
God is watching over His Household and He strengthens and rewards the woman who does her best to watch over hers. The confidence her husband has in her empowers her all the more.
The family is the second greatest enjoyment in life. Our first enjoyment is our relationship with our Father God through Jesus Christ His Son.