This morning, while reading about the Apostle Paul standing before the leaders of Israel and giving an account of his life in Christ, I began asking myself a question. What would I say if I had to stand before others and explain my life with Jesus Christ? Would they see a man who followed religious rules, or someone who learned through failure, rebellion, and surrender what it means to belong to Him?
During high school, I belonged to a wonderful church youth group. While other students enjoyed the usual high school activities, my life centered around church. Those years helped establish my faith, but they also taught me something that would trouble me for years. Christianity seemed to be measured by rules. What you wore, where you went, what you did, and how often you attended church became the evidence of your relationship with God.
After graduation, I rebelled against those rules. I entered a world that was far removed from my Christian upbringing. Those who knew me probably questioned whether I was even a believer. But what they could not see was the Holy Spirit living within me. Even when I walked into some of the darkest and most wicked places, He went with me. He spoke to my heart when I refused to listen. I could turn my back on what I had been taught, but I could never escape His presence.
Eventually, I surrendered my life completely to Jesus Christ. Not to a church, not to a pastor, and certainly not to religious rules. I surrendered to Him. I wanted to know Him, follow Him, and live under the direction of His Spirit. I returned to church, but before long, I found myself trapped in the same system I had once rebelled against. I remember feeling guilty for missing a Sunday night service. Today, I ask myself whether that guilt came from the Holy Spirit or from the expectations of men. There is a difference between God’s conviction and religious pressure.
Years later, Carol and I joined others in establishing a new fellowship. For fourteen years, we experienced the Lord working in ways I had never known. Our calling was to reach young people, restore those who had fallen in ministry, encourage discouraged believers, and support missions. We saw lives changed and people restored. Eventually, we went our separate ways, not because of division, but to share with others what the Lord had taught us. Those years showed me that ministry was about people, not maintaining an organization.
Yet today, I still see the same religious thinking that troubled me as a young man. Churches establish rules that appear righteous, then use those rules to measure the faithfulness of others. A person can attend every service, follow every tradition, and still have a heart far from God. Another can struggle, make mistakes, and yet have a genuine love for Jesus Christ.
Paul understood this. Before meeting Jesus on the Damascus Road, he was devoted to religious law. He believed he was serving God while persecuting those who followed Christ. His religious zeal had blinded him to the very Lord he claimed to serve.
Jesus warned about this when He said, “This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart is far from me” (Matthew 15:8).
Today, Carol and I do not attend a traditional church, and I know some have judged us because of it. Yet we continue walking with the Lord and serving Him. We have opportunities to minister to people who are hurting, discouraged, or overlooked by the organized church. Our ministry has not ended simply because we no longer sit in a church pew on Sunday morning.
One Scripture often used against people like us is Hebrews 10:25: “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together.” But read what surrounds those words. Hebrews 10:24–25 speaks of encouraging one another and stirring one another toward love and good works. It does not command attendance at a particular building or denomination. Carol and I have not abandoned fellowship or ministry. We simply serve the Lord outside the traditional church structure. Not attending a church service is NOT the same as forsaking the fellowship of believers.
Martin Luther famously declared, “My conscience is captive to the Word of God.” That is where I want my conscience to remain, not captive to the expectations of religious men.
If I stood before those leaders today, as Paul once did, I would not defend every decision I have made. I have failed too many times. But I would tell them that through rebellion, mistakes, religious bondage, and years of ministry, Jesus Christ has never abandoned me.
One day, I will stand before Him and give an account of my life. I will not be asked whether I satisfied every church rule or pleased those who judged me. I will answer for how I lived and what I did with what He entrusted to me.
I did not surrender my life to the church, or any religion. I surrendered it to Jesus Christ. And after all these years, He is still the One I follow.