The Proverbs 31 Woman – Chapter 37 – Leaders of Influence

“Those who are wise will shine like the brightness of the heavens, and those who lead many to righteousness, like the stars for ever and ever.” Daniel 12:3-4


Righteousness is doing that which is right according to God. In each human a seed of “greatness” has been put by our wonderful Creator Father God. My husband has told each of our grandchildren: “There’s greatness in you!” And he’s right because God has said that we are created in His image. And, God is GREAT – that is for sure!


In each of us is a seed of greatness that only needs to be developed and used for righteousness. This always blesses our Father God, no matter what we do that is productive with our strength and time. Whether you want to me a mother and helpmate, farmer or fisherman, builder or soldier, designer or doctor, artist or author, teacher or missionary, pastor or president, to name a few – it’s there in its “seed” form of desire and yearning. As a little girl, whenever I was asked what I wanted to be when I grow up it was always a “mother.” After I became a Christian and began to read God’s Word and specifically the part in Proverbs about the “Proverbs 31 Woman,” that teaching of the indwelling Holy Spirit became my power and joy.


Mom, pay attention to the little things your little children do; what they lean towards; what they like doing with their hands (not counting remotes for games and all). A child will be inclined to express a desire (seed of greatness) even at a very young age, and so often it’s not taken seriously by parents that are far too busy. If there’s anyone in a child’s life who should see their potential – it’s their daddy and mommy. Today we have teachers and even deceived parents telling their children that they can’t trust the gender they were born with! Sheer evil! The clear deception of the devil.


A parent can either help develop that “seed,” or they can cause it to die in the ground without watering (attention and encouragement). A little growth (starting to show) can be choked out by weeds that are not pulled away. A “weed” can even be what the parent/parents want their child to do or be that they always wanted to do or be and never was able for whatever reason. They can set up their child to fail this way. So help your child to grow up to be the best he/she can be – according to what their Creator Father put in them. They will shine brightly doing that which is a benefit to others and to the society they live in. The will become leaders that influence others in the right way.


In every generation God chooses faithful men to get their work done on time and in the right way in accordance with God’s redemption plan.


Does your husband know what God requires of a man, a husband and a father? Does your husband feel your support of his true masculinity as God designed a man for the work he is to do – unto the Lord, and how he is to lead his family and be a good influence out in society? And, do you and your husband talk about this, pray about this and listen to God in His Word about it? Do you pray for your husband’s line of work with his position and responsibility, whatever it is? God has made the man to be the head of his wife and children, and it’s the wife’s position and responsibility to respect that and support him in every way she can; even making sure the children respect and obey their father.


What if it comes down to whose job is more important: yours and your husband’s? How do you judge that? Do you both see what is important at home for the family in determining whose career is more important? Is it about who makes more money?


I have found that what I think of my husband and how I go about supporting him can help make his work far less difficult and more meaningful to him. You might not mean to, but as a childish or covetous wife you can hinder your husband from being happy in his work whatever it is. (Ecclesiastes 5:18-20)


Jesus came to some men and asked them to leave their work and come join Him in the Father’s work. They had debts to pay and families to feed, but the Lord met their needs. I would imagine it was hard for each of them to leave what they had been doing all their lives and go with a man they hardly knew yet. But as they walked with Jesus – they found the life that is truly life. I’ve often wondered what their wives and children thought; at least those apostles who had wives and children.


Jesus didn’t go to these men’s wives to tell them His plans for their husbands and neither did He ask their permission if He could train and use their husbands. I would imagine that Jesus knew what these men would face at home after telling their wives what they planned to do with Jesus; that it would cause marital problems with some of these men, but Jesus had the eternal future of their families at heart. When the Lord calls a man (with wife and children) his wife makes a choice too, whether to submit and follow, or to resist and separate herself. To submit and follow is wise and noble. To resist and separate is not only wicked but will influence your children’s thinking in the wrong way.


Whether the Lord has told His man to leave his work or remain where he is – every born-again man has been given the Lord’s “Great Commission,” (Matthew 28:18-20) and he starts at home with his wife and children – making disciples. Boys without fathers make the best recruits for gangs, terrorists and criminal activity of all kinds. People without God make the best recruits for the devil and his evil work in the world.


When we commit to God’s will – God commits to us. When the Lord invites us to step out with Him – He takes hold of us, and our concerns become His concerns. God is more than capable of leading men and providing for their families. If you do not trust God’s love and wisdom this is something YOU need to work on. Don’t come against your husband with argument and ultimatums. Fear will cause you to do this. Faith in God and His Word will keep you at your husband’s side.


If you are a ball and chain around your husband’s ankle, making it hard for him to do God’s will, what might God do about that? If you think you should make your husband choose between you and God, beware. Your husband will not stand before you on Judgment Day.


When a man fears his wife – God passes him by. When God passes your husband by – you all lose out. Don’t underestimate a man’s deepest need to intimately know and serve His God. Your husband needs this more than he needs you.


A long time ago I tried to “groom” my husband (like most wives do) into my definition of what a man’s spiritual leadership looks like, but my discerning husband wasn’t going to put up with it. The day came when he had had enough of my sugar coated criticisms and he said, “Carol, you aren’t going to change me, so if you think I’m not the man I should be then you’d better go to God because He’s the only One who can change me.” So I did, and God started changing me first. We both changed over time.


The spirit of jezebel has women thinking and believing that they can and should validate a man’s masculinity and his spiritual leadership. The devil is bent on changing God’s design as male and female, femininity and masculinity. We see his success in homosexual activity and transgender operations.


As God called to Adam, He calls to all men in hiding, “Where are you man?” (Genesis 3:9) God will hold men accountable for leadership on the earth and the influence they have on their wife and children, and on society as a whole.


When God needs something done, according to His plan and purpose, and there isn’t a man to be found in that place through which to work, He raises up a godly woman to take that place. We see this in the account of Deborah and Barak. (Judges 4) Deborah, a judge, did not want the honor that should’ve been Barak’s in leading the men into battle, but Barak wouldn’t go unless she went with him. And so the honor of victory went to an obedient woman.


Every man is to come out of hiding and lead. Every boy is to be raised for leadership; to benefit his family and society. A godly mother will work hard at this for her son to grow up to be an honorable leader in the area of his calling and gifts from God. Mothers and fathers are to endow their sons and daughters with: truth – the knowledge of God; with reliability – training them to be honest/trustworthy/responsible; with wisdom – the short and long term consequences for everything they do.


As women we need to remember what happened to Moses’ sister Miriam who interfered with how God was leading Israel through Moses. She said to her other brother Aaron, “Has the Lord indeed spoken only through Moses? Has He not spoken through us as well? And the Lord heard it.” (Numbers 12:2) God struck her with leprosy and she was put outside the camp seven days. God humbled her. Moses prayed for her as the Lord instructed, and she was healed and brought back in. Miriam learned a hard lesson in honoring who God has chosen to lead His people.


Sickness, death, family and social destruction ramp up when the wrong people are leading and influencing society.

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